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July 2, 2005 Enjoying my weekend off….got a big package from home yesterday, great artsy craft stuff. I have all kinds of plans for it…about 4 of the younger volunteers came by today and looked it all over…felt like Christmas here…I let them shop from all the stuff scattered on my bed…we all have different projects going, some stuff for Itsy Bitsy crèche school…some for the Valley preschool and some for craft projects we are doing with the teenagers. I know I have shared this with you before but right now it is upmost on my mind. … I have been working a lot of night shifts which include me bathing and putting the babies and preschool children to bed. The children seem to respond the most to me after reading them bedtime stories … usually I am real strict until I get them calmed down and settled in, but I would trade nothing for the feeling I get when I put the lights out… lay down with them on the pushed together four cots smelling of urine and begin singing stories to them until they fall asleep… they fall asleep touching me in some way…my hair…my hand …my breast…my face. I am a mother with a mother’s love ….I don’t need to make this any more complicated than that. I sing about the day…I sing about how I can’t remember or say their names yet and that I still call to them “hey you” but how much I love them anyway. This time always brings me back to the reality of why I came here…that all they really want from me is a mothers love and I can do that with my terrible singing and singing about how wonderful and special they are to me… this brings me such joy… One of the babies in a crib is sickly and is usually asleep before I read my stories…but on this one night I looked over and she is sitting up and pointing to me ..(she does not speak) she wanted to be on the cot with me and the other children while I read. You have to know this brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart. Maureen --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 4, 2005 This is the end of a great week end off. I go back to work at 1:30 today. I spent most of the week end just relaxing and thinking about my time here thus far. My room mate Libby and I went for a walk yesterday on the property. The rubbish dump is someplace behind our house so I wanted to investigate…been told by many that is where all the monkeys hang out. Sorry to say no monkeys that day but there were four children from the nearby valley going through all the rubbish…a somber thought. This morning Libby and I decided to walk down into one of the valleys nearby…we are told not to go walking unless you are with someone…the down hill walk felt so good…the walk back up the hills UGH ! We passed about 8 local children carrying wood bundles on their heads…we nodded and smiled at them…they spoke no English. It is very cold here in the morning and the evenings now so I am sure the wood was for kindling for a fire tonight. We passed a pasture on the hillside with cows…I bet those cows are the ones I see in my yard at times or at my bedroom window. Libby and I shared many thoughts about ourselves, our lives and our work here. Libby works as a volunteer teacher in the preschool in the valley during the week and here on weekends (the one we are gathering supplies for) I want to share with you a story she told me on our walk; The children here are on a three week holiday (school break) some of the children have extended families or Gogo’s in the valley and went home for a few days…some children (Oprah sponsored children) about 12 of them went away for the weekend a real holiday and came back last night while Libby was working in another house….they came to the house to visit the other children (the children that had no place to go for any part of the holiday) they came in with their arms loaded down with presents they had received and wanted to show them off to the other children. Libby’s children showed nothing but delight that the other children received such wonderful gifts…not any outward appearance of jealousy (can this be so) Libby said her heart was hurting so seeing the other children dressed so nicely and having so many wonderful gifts and her children having nothing at all. I wanted to cry when hearing this story … I know there is a lesson in all of this but I have not figured it out yet. Maureen p.s. wish me well…I am going to the office before I go to work to see if I can get into their warehouse to look for socks and warmer clothes for my kids….the weather has definitely turned cold. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 9, 2005 The little abandoned rondavel is officially opening a week from Monday. Can you believe it, only a couple of weeks ago I told you we were talking about making it into a nursery school for the crèche children here. We are hoping to get a sign saying – ITSY BITSY CRECHE I believe I mentioned before we needed to get a window replaced and some sort of electricity before we could use it. As of today we have both…YES!!! God is good! I never dreamed we would have anything other than an extension cord from another bldg…we now have an overhead light…just a bulb…but nevertheless…a real light with a pull string…I could not be any happier. After my shift tomorrow we are going to clean it up and get it ready for the following week to open….this is so great …the timing could not be any better…all the other kids go back to school from their 3 week holiday a week from Monday…and now the crèche babies and toddlers have someplace to go during the cold days. We are really creating a nursery school..lesson plans and all…rec’d some great stuff from Sandra (a friend of Our Journey)… and have been told from Our Journey staff more supplies are on there way here. Can you believe it… we now have an itsy bitsy yard with a sand box ready for them to play in…I got the sand toys a couple of weeks ago when I was able to get to Durban to a mall…and remember I told you a volunteer carried trash buckets of sand for me….it will be a blast…I will take pictures the first day of school. I could not wait to tell the other volunteers I work with in the crèche (all younger volunteers) they were as excited as I was…we actually were jumping up and down with joy. Still jumping with joy, ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 9, 2005 Not even sure I know where to begin to tell you about tonight…..but I have to start someplace. Tonight I volunteered to work with the youth group…only the older teenage girls tonight. We used the dinning room…the girls came in their pjs, we did facials…cucumbers and all….hand and foot massages….CD’s playing in the background….some of the girls were teaching one of the younger volunteers some dance moves…somehow I can’t do this evening justice with words. By the end of the night the girls were calling me Fluffy, said my skin was so soft and fluffy…they kept wanting to touch me. ..it was a kind way of saying fat. It was done in such a loving way that I felt so close to them…When I read this I can’t seem to get across on paper the warm fuzzy feelings I have tonight….but trust me it was a special night for me and the girls. Maureen ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 12 , 2005 I have so much to learn and so little time to learn it in. If I keep going back to why I am here, I manage to be able to get a better handle on myself.it is to love the forgotten children with a mothers love and that will never change.it seems writing about this is therapeutic in itself, this is reminding me about yesterday.a special moment..even though I may get in trouble for it.so be it.it was worth it. I was laying on the Gogo's bed during la la time (nap time) waiting for all the crèche babies to go to sleep when an older preschool child that does not take nap s(he is considered somewhat of a trouble maker came in to the crèche bedroom to go the bathroom.he thought I was asleep and came over to the bed and squeezed himself in beside me. Before I knew it he was sound asleep beside me in the bed with his hand touching me (he would never attempt to do this if I was a Gogo).not trying to be sappy .but it made my day! About an hour later in marched about 8 preschool children hands on their hips pointing to us and saying with some authority " Gogo Regina is looking for Amachle .he is not suppose to be in here." You are probably thinking .."Maureen.you should know better".I do.but I would do it again..it felt soooo good and so right. Later on tonight - Someone just knocked on our door (I am off tonight) and told us there is a bonfire going on now for all the kids, the younger volunteers organized it.. they had drums, a big bonfire, marshmallows, all the kids were singing, some playing the drums, a volunteer was putting on a fire show (twirling wood torches around).and hot chocolate for everyone. It was pretty cold out there. The volunteers amaze me. They were feeling bad for all the kids that were left behind on this 3 week holiday and wanted them to have something special before all the other kids that are away came back. I was there about 3 minutes before three of the older teenage girls I worked with at youth club Saturday night came running over to me yelling "Fluffy" and put their arms around me.one pulled me aside and told me she had a friend that was sad and crying away from the group.she led me to her.and left me there..before leaving me she said she is crying because she misses her Mother..I don't have any idea who she is. It was really dark .I sat with her for quite awhile with my arms around her while she cried. she never spoke.she did not push me away. it was awkward for a few minutes but it felt right just being quiet and holding her .I had about 3 single strands of local beaded necklaces on my neck I put one on her before I left her and told her I would be around tomorrow is she wanted to or needed to talk. Tomorrow, I will look for the teenage girl that is wearing the necklace..I could not see her face clearly in the dark. I believe again my God is teaching me..in time I may or may not understand exactly what it is.but I already feel better having had the opportunity to hold that child in my arms. Sometimes we give exactly what we ourselves are needing. I am learning age has nothing to do with it.we are all babies. Maureen ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 15, 2005 Itsy Bitsy crèche School opened today…what an amazing and exhausting week it has been. Not sure how or why it all happened the way it did…but I am thankful nevertheless! Everybody seemed to have a part in it…a week ago the place was a mess without any power and a window out, the little yard we are using for a sand play area had very little sand and a chicken wire fence that needed a lot of mending, the gate to go into the little yard was broken…had no way of closing or locking it. Let me describe it a week later…first Hannah from UK (younger volunteer) cleaned it out thoroughly…washed, swept and cleaned walls…next Sheldon…a permanent local maintenance staff member was there putting new window panes in the broken windows…installing a light bulb overhead…can you imagine…I was going to be impressed if we had an extension cord from another building…This morning I am heading off to work this morning and again another busy bee working…another local zulu man was mending our fence for the school .Of course we were making the curtains the day before we opened school…got management to donate some white sheet like material…they even gave some old paint that you can use on material…water based….there is even more, they offered to let us use a sewing machine to do the hems of the curtains…a lot of help was needed before the machine would work correctly but lo and behold Lizzie’s (from Scotland) dad was visiting her and he fixed it for us. I was called to the office and told Heather (Director and Founder of the orphanage wanted to visit our school on opening day) the pressure was on now. Heather is usually away traveling around the world to raise funds for GGA, she just got back a few days ago and will go away again soon…I had never met her before. Kristi , a younger volunteer from Canada was up late finishing up the curtains for morning (mind you we still had to paint the curtains before school was to open at 10:00am). I know I am jumping around telling this but this is the way it was …we were running around like chickens without heads…after we got the babies dressed and had breakfast we took them back to their house…spread brown paper on the floor and layed the white sheet material on I and took all the babies in crèche clothes off…left them in their nappies (diapers) and covered their feet and hands in paint…yep…that’s how we decide to decorate the curtains. footprints and handprints…it was a circus…our plan was to do each child then one of us volunteers (there were three of us on) would take that child and put it directly in the bathtub and wash and dress them…mind you we needed to be in school and ready for class and visitors by 10. We had a plan…but we did not plan that one of the Gogos would walk into the bathroom lock the door and get into the only bathtub…you got the picture- screaming babies covered in paint and no place to put them…it was hilarious….my clothes were covered in paint, some babies had it all over their hair….the Gogo finally finished her leisure bath and came out and we could finally use the tub to wash the paint off the babies and get them ready for their first day at their Itsy Bitsy crèche School. In the middle of all of this we found out the day before that one of our babies, Lungelo was going to be two today…we scrambled. They don’t do individual cakes for the children’s birthdays but we are so small and have so few babies we decided we were committed to doing this for them. Thank God for Jennie another wonderful younger volunteer from Scotland offered to make a cake…she worked most of the night doing this when she got off work yesterday. We had cake..popcorn and jello that you eat with your hands…yep…with your hands! It was a memorable day for all, the children and the volunteers and the local staff. I had someone take a lot of pictures while all this was happening will show them to you when I can get someone to download them for me. This is living life to the fullest…I am so thankful to be here. Maureen p.s. I left out a good part….the sand yard was a complete success…Our Journey purchased all the sand toys…the kids were in heaven playing in their very own “very little” fenced in yard with their new toys. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- June 18, 2005 Our Journey purchased 6 laundry baskets for the kids to play in…it was so cool…I keep the baskets at my house and take the crèche children here at least once a day to play in my yard (we call it a Crèche field trip) instead of the dirt in front of the crèche …they get in them…put them on their heads … roll in them…I will buy wooden spoons so they can bang on them the next time I get out. I took quite a few pictures, will attach them when I can get them downloaded … think I told you before I had to take the Kodak software program off my computer so I need to have someone else download them on a CD for me…you all will love them! On a sadder note…One of my babies that has been real sickly has had some real bad days and nights recently…her breathing is so fast and labored at times that I sometimes think it could be her last breath…it is strange, if she were anyplace else she would be in a hospital on monitors…but here we continue to dress her in the morning and one of us will carry her all day if she is in too much pain to sit in the stroller…life can be so sad at times…my insides sometimes just want to cry out… I am not sure how long this will go on…all of a sudden she will have a few good days then its downhill again, high fevers, fast breathing and a real fast heart beat… From what I can gather there is no emergency plan in place for the night time…not sure how the Gogo will handle it….. I am so thankful I have taken up with both Gogo’s, that work in the crèche. Something to smile about…I have given both Gogos a cartoon character nurses smock…they love them…they wear them every day and look at me and say “friend” they speak very, very limited English. I am not sure I will ever get the full meaning of this year until I have gone home and reread my journals… Maureen -------------------------------------------------------------------- July 20, 2005 Where do I begin..a heart warming story about our day at Itsy Bitsy crèche School..that’s where I will begin – for starters, we try to teach about 10 minutes of the hour they are in Itsy Bitsy crèche in the mornings….today was the fourth day of school…we had their attention for about 14 minutes teaching the letter “A”…getting better the precious part – I read a story to them afterwards and was able to keep their attention…the best is yet to come…Zulu woman carry their babies on their backs…usually some sort of blanket is wrapped around the Gogo’s body holding the baby close to their backs…leaving the Gogo’s heads and hands free to carry other stuff. Our Journey purchased some small baby dolls and little baby bottles and I cut an old sheet into blankets for them to carry their babies on their backs….you just can’t even imagine what I experienced…they loved carrying them around on their little backs (our babies range from 15 months to 3), they sang Zulu song, they feed them the bottles then they laid their babies down for lala (naps) on the blanket (old sheet piece) and laid beside them on the concrete floor still singing to them…talk about warm fuzzies…I was having tons of them! My sickly baby sat by on a volunteers lap watching us for most of it…then before we knew it she was pointing to the baby dolls and sheet…yep…we strapped one to her back…even got a little smile out of her (that’s a real plus – we don’t get too many of those) Love, ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ July 31, 2005 Dear Family and Friends, It’s been a little while since my last journal entry, a lot has been happening in my personal life and my life here. My daughter Kristine had a miscarriage a couple of weeks ago; it has been hard on both of us with me not being with her and Ben at this time. This is the second miscarriage she has had this year, please keep her and Ben in your prayers as they have some extensive testing done to see if they can find the problem causing these miscarriages. I will try to bring you up to date on my life in South Africa, I continue to be blessed with support from all of you back home… Wendy, the scarves were quite a success, the Gogo’s loved them … I could not wait until Christmas :>) It is a Zulu custom that Gogo’s must cover their heads …so the colorful scarves were greatly appreciated.) A funny story about them, I saved some of the smaller ones for my crèche kids…I put them on their little heads and put white cold cream like the Gogo’s and Aunties do on their faces.…we giggled the whole time…it was a special day for everyone. Every six months we treat every child here for worms and scabies (caused by their diets) that time was this week…what a week…it took the whole week to complete this…it was quite a task…I learned more than I ever need to know about a child that has worms and how they come out after they have been treated …YUCK…more than I signed up for :>) It was hard to watch the treatment for scabies…some of my babies had them…the medicine they use is very harsh and it really stings…all the children had to be washed down with this medicine. it was not an easy week to say the least for the children or me…it is finally done and over with….won’t worry about it for another six months. My lap top crashed this week so until my new/used one arrives here (should be in a couple of weeks) my journal entries will not get out on a regular basis but know I am thinking about you all. Please rest assured I still believe with all my heart I am where I am supposed to be… Much love to you all, |